This weekend I spent some time bonding with my DVR which included catching up on "The Real Housewives of Orange County." Without going too much into the show itself...as that is not the intention of my post...this season has a totally different feeling then the prior ones, and is almost a little bit sad to watch. They are all broke, and all seem to hate each other in a way that goes beyond the normal, entertaining, cattiness.
On last week's episode Tamra and Simon (who appears to have become evil) went to dinner with the new housewife, Alexis and her husband. For some some reason they got into this strange conversation about their relationships, how their husbands need to treat them, sneaking into closets to have sex, being soul mates, blah, blah, blah. The whole thing was pretty awkward and most likely staged.
During said conversation Alexis said how her and her husband are never away from each other and if she goes somewhere without him she feels sad and wishes he was there or wants to just go home. That really got to me. Personally, I hate it when people equate the level they are "in love" or that they are "soul mates" with how much time they spend together.
In college I had several friends who would NEVER do anything except hang out with their boyfriends and seemed to treat those who were not always with their boyfriends (like myself) as part of a lesser relationships.
Personally, I would much rather be in a relationship where each party has time by themselves and with friends and is not always with their significant other. Yes, it is very important to spend time as a couple, but at the end of the day you still are your own person. And your other relationships are important too, are they not?
Maybe I am way off base here...what do you think about people who only seem to spend time with their significant other? Are they just more in love or are they just co-dependent?
Monday, November 16, 2009
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5 comments:
Okay, I love my fiancee. But if we went everywhere together I would kill him. We both make points to either spend a day alone with our friends (not every week, but it happens at least once a month) and he even takes a yearly guys trip. Also, we don't live together (not for any sort of moral reasons, we just both still have our leases) and while I sometimes spend the night there, the only consecutive nights are friday and saturday. It may sound weird, but it is nice to know that I miss him when I am not around him.
I agree - even though I don't particularly LIKE to be away from the husband, there is some truth to the old 'absence makes the heart grow fonder...' :)
The hubs would not be happy joining my Mom and I on our shopping sessions and I'm more than ok with him watching ball games with his friend rather than me. That being said. I do quite miss the hubs when we go out of town separately. Hopefully I'm not co-dependent. Ah ha
Personally I think it's a personality thing and not a statement of better or worse - in either direction - for the relationship. People who are more relationship-ally (ha) codependent will find similar personalities and always be together, and people who are more independently defined will find likewise and then there may be somewhere in the middle, I dunno.. but i've seen it many ways and I think it's LAME-O when it becomes a judgement thing.
ANwyayyyy I left you something on my blog:)
www.so-say-i.blogspot.com
I would say that it sounds more like co-dependence than love. It is normal to miss your husband when you are away from each other for a few days, but not a few hours. That is a little much!
My husband and I have some different hobbies and interests and are able to each pursue those things without dragging the other person along with us. Then when we get home we are happy to spend some "us' time together too.
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